Five Things Wrong With Star Wars

Five Things Wrong With Star Wars

Yes, fans. There is something wrong with the entire Star Wars universe (other than the whole TV series which is wrong in and of itself). And hopefully J.J. Abrams will totally clear up with a wormhole and Red Matter and Leonard Nimoy.

  1. The planets.
    The thing is: If all of them are humans, how is it possible to breath. I can see aliens. But what about Luke, Obi-Wan, Nick Fury-I mean, Mace Windu. If all of them are human I don’t see any elaborate thing they have in their heads like in Star Trek, and I don’t see the space suits.
  2. Apparently in a galaxy far, far away.
    Yes, but once again this is about the humans. Where do they come from? Were they born on Earth 2.0 made by mice and Bill Nighy? Nope. Apparently most of them are either born or raised on Tatooine.
  3. How C-3PO can still stay shiny after walking around in dirt and sand in Star Wars movie six.
    Yes, he’s shiny. Due to all the times Lucasfilm made him all shiny and golden between takes. Come on! If R2-D2 and his shiny pal walked through a sandstorm they would both be as dirty as a pile of shi-at.
  4. Darth Vader died and Leia isn’t mourning?
    Sure, her dad was an evil criminal mastermind, like the Joker. But she didn’t even attend his burning ritual. Everyone attended Qui-Gon’s burning. But only Luke was there when his dad died. Shooting for the favorite kid, eh, Luke?
  5. Star Wars, The Phantom Menace.
    Now, this is podracing. *Shudders* Where did Lucasfilm go completely wrong with Star Wars? By making a CGI TV show and Phantom Menace. Kill me. How Obi-Wan could deal with young Anakin is beyond me. You are strong, dude. But, seriously, as HISHE can say (even though they haven’t released their Phantom Menace How It Should Have Ended,) that the reason they are in the process of making the PHHISHE is that there’s not just one thing wrong with that movie, there are enough to make a video about.

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